Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
