Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
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