Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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