dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
