No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
