no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
