Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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