Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize