I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize