I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
