Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
