Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
