So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
