very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
