Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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