a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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