my soul wont recognize me after tonight
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
