Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
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