Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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