chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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