They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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