Need sex. Gaining weight.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
He better not be in your backpack
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
