I cockslap morals
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Is it penis luge time yet?
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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