rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize