If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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