I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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