nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
