Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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