if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
