Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
