By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
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I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
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I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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