Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Randomize
