when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
