It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
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