i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
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