ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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