bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Betty ford says i'm here all night
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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