The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
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