I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I believe in your delicious
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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