I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
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