Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Randomize
