Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
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