yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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