You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize