i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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