I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
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