Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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