You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
