Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
