Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
